Thursday, November 29, 2007

The Middle-Name Tag or What's my Middle-name Ma?

I'm beginning to like these tags; not because they call for a lot of introspection, retrospection or maybe even fill up the otherwise-empty space in my blog.
No wait, those actually are the reasons. :D
Face it, they're fun. Especially when these topics are as absurd as the one I'm doing right now thanks to fellow-blogger Lavs. Check her blog out, she'll make you laugh to splits. :D

The rules of the tag are:
1. The rules must be mentioned in the beginning of the tag.
2. You must list one fact that is somehow relevant to your life for each letter of your middle name. If you don’t have a middle name, use the middle name you would have liked to have had.
3. At the end of your blog post, you need to choose one person for each letter of your middle name to tag. Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they’re tagged, and to read your blog.

Awritey then.
For starters, I've never actually known what my middle name is. In fact, I never even knew I had one of the sort.
We the people ofTamil Nadu don't have a middle-name or a family name making us pretty much unlike the rest of the nation and we take ultimate pride in doing everything differently (read ostracizing ourselves from the rest of the nation for political reasons I do not wish to get into lest some MLA clad in white from a popular kakshee (read party) happens to bump into my blog and vanquish my family, but wait am I digressing? )

Right...middle-name-tag. I hear you. :D
I just discovered this morning from my mom that my middle name is 'Rukmini'.

Yeah yeah, you can laugh it out while I take a long walk around my house.


Right.Its my grandmother's name and I'm eternally grateful to my folks for not deciding to christen me by that name (I'm having enough trouble with my first name itself thank you very much)
Reminds me of a conversation between a pair from the-popular-sitcom where they discuss what to name their yet-to-be-born baby girl:

Ross: I like Ruth. What about Ruth?
Rachel: Oh, I'm sorry, are we having an 89-year-old? How about Dayton?


R- for Red.
Dark red. I just love that shade. Thats what most of my wardrobe comprises of. Well, next to pink actually (please don't judge me :D) I've read that red as a colour for your clothes is rather provocative. Bull. I've been to places wearing red and even my mother wouldn't notice me. :P
So much for colour-psychology.

U- for Unique.
Thats what my 'first' name is. Rhymes with Rukmini. Hell lot more complicated than the same. There used to be a time when I'd curse my name for the complexities I had to endure because of it but now, I love it 'coz here is no other like it. No chance of having 2 me's in the same class, in the same college, or for that matter, in the same state itself. (;-P) .
I think this should say more.

K- for Karnatic Music.
My heart. My soul. I wish to do it proud, some day.

M- for Madras.
A place I spend half my time cursing and yet, defending till I run out of breath. A lot of my friends AND a lot of my relatives find some sense of queer pride in chiding this conservative metro for its weather, its people (whom I'm told are very 'unkind'. Yeah, I'll show you unkind ;-P), its narrow-outlook towards contemporary ways of life (read rock-concerts, pubs and discotheques or the lack of them) and most importantly, its haughty auto-men.
(Well with regard to the last point, I sort of agree that our auto-kaarans are a special species altogether and deserve special mention in a separate post itself).

But what about Madras, the cultural-haven?
The place where you can be confident that you're children would have gotten their share of both worlds if not just the ultra-traditional one. The proud host of December Music Season..
The home of India's much prided dance Bharathnatyam...The place where people are simple and don't judge you for not dressing up like Rani Mukherjee just to shop at a vegetable store nearby..

I often do run out of arguments to defend this place for what it is and isnt and sometimes all I'm capable of doing is just being silent. Anyway, its just one less person to tolerate in this city :D

I- for Intolerance.
Thats what I have for people who kill the English language with absolutely no concern for its grammar or pronunciation. Yes, no one's infallible I agree. But to those who refuse to correct 'cannot be able to' or 'please say me how to' despite repeated correction. I'm not playing Shakespear or English-miss here, but if you want to speak a language, shouldn't you at least try to know how?

N- for Neverland.
A place I've truly always been fascinated over ever since I was old enough to understand the dialogues from Disney's Peter Pan. I fell in love with Peter, Tinker-Bell, Captain Hook, the mighty pirates, cute croc and the captivating concept of a faraway land where you'd never grow up.
It was nice to think about then, but as I grow older, I tend to wish it were more than just a fantasy.

I- for India.
Kidding, that was lame. But wait, actually, why not? For a country that I never ever thought I'd fit into a decade ago, its now become a place I'd live in despite its many cons. I'm now reluctant to live anywhere else under ANY pretext; be it work or the inevitable, matrimony.

I now tag thee Preethi , Venki, Busy_Writer and Mark IV and anyone else who wishes to take this tag up.
Do me proud guys ;-)

Much love!


Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Whats up Doc

Evil-Doctor (ED) sticking evil- laser down poor-me 's throat:

ED: Say 'aaaaaaaaaaaaaa'

Me (mouth wide open): 'aaaeeee'

ED: Say 'aaaaaaaaaaaaaa'

Me (with more conviction but not quite): 'aaee'

ED: No, say 'aaaaaaaaaaaa'

Me(almost close to tears): 'aaee'

Am suddenly reminded of Henry Higgins from My Fair Lady where he'd eat Eliza Dolittle 's brains forcing her to get her 'ayyy' s and 'aaai's right. Frankly, am rather disturbed that I cant enunciate 'aaaa' with precision just like the doc has instructed me to, but with him pulling my toungue out and a nurse pulling the corners of my mouth side-ways for an endoscopy (dont picture that please), I realize that the only possible vowel that can be uttered at this point is 'ae'.
So, enough already.

ED(looking at TV which supposedly screens the insides of throat): Hmmm.. your vocal chords asdfasn sdfgdfg kasdfadsf gdfgdfgafg (something in medicine-language which I couldn't comprehend of course). Think you've over-strained them.
(Right..that should explain why I've been sounding like a frog for the last 1 week)

Worried-mommy: what?

ED: Just have these for a week and get back. And oh yes, did I mention absolutely no talking for the next 5 days?

Me (aghast): What the...

Suddenly-not-so-worried-mommy: You mean she's not supposed to all?

Very ED: Yes, thats the minimum period she'll have rest to allow her throat to heal.

Me (touching mouth to see if its in place after agonizing session with evil-doc and evil-nurse): Can we go home now mommy?

So, now that I've been sentenced to a 5-day tenure of 'mounavrath', the only form of allowable communication is the scribe and paper. But if that means having to write every single word I wish to utter, I fancy just keeping my gob shut and not say anything at all...which is exactly what I'm doing now. (*sob*)
The house seems a lot quieter now and I'm sure the entire neighborhood must seem so too, considering all the yelling and debating my mom 'n I are depriving it of.

My dad keeps forgetting that I can't talk and whats worse is that he just doesn't seem to understand any of my sign-languages. I had to do a mini-dance show to convey that we had to get back to the Doc's after 5 days.
Like, I'd stick my hand out to convey 5 as in 5 days and he'd be like.. 'Stop? But what do you want me to stop?' :P

Oh well.
1 down.
4 more to go.


Thursday, November 15, 2007

Sometimes 'sorry' seems to be the most difficult word to say.

Precariously egoistic. Yeah, I think so too.

Saturday, November 10, 2007

New News

Finally. The two movies are out.

I can now heave a sigh of relief and watch all the national chaos on the telly like good 'ol times.
Whether its Mamta Banerjee wailing her guts out in Nandigram or the lil kid with 8 limbs or good 'ol Sonia Gandhi reading out verbatim from her transliterated script...I really missed watching all the real news which was moreorless overshadowed with all the hue 'n cry over the Diwali releases 'Om Shanthi Om' and 'Saawariya'.
One more look at Shahruk's hand getting stuck to Deepika Padukone's pallu or Ranbir Kapoor prancing about the sets of Saawariya in his white towel which looks like its gonna fall off any second and I will solemnly swear never again to switch on the telly (news channels, get a life. Please.)

But wait a minute...whats that I hear you say..Its not yet over???
Movie review time???

Oh Dear.

Sunday, November 4, 2007

The Idiot's Guide to SysAdmin'ing..

A few things those 'How to' books didn't tell me...

  1. Crying out loud to Ravi and Johnson may not necessarily be the solution to all mainframe problems.
  2. Oops is certainly not an appropriate response-to any boo-boo.
  3. 'Oh, is that really a command? Cooool!' is not is NOT an acceptable reaction however genuine it may be.
  4. It doesn't pay to curse someone over the phone without pressing the mute button.
  5. No, it never really does.
  6. 'I'll be right back' is the most frequently used phrase next to 'Huh? How'd that happen???'
  7. You can run but you certainly cant hide.
  8. Its a fact that half you're problems are because people get locked out of their systems every day. Dwell on it.
  9. No, its not your problem when someone calls you and tells you he's locked out of his house. Hang up already.
  10. Lets just try and hide that subtle element joy when we say 'Oh, thats not our problem. Try the neighbouring team'
  11. The log never lies. This just reinforces point #7
  12. No, you cant help yourself when you're locked out of you're own system. Well, like they say, every SysAd has her day.
  13. The 'I dunno why...but my boss told me to press that button' routine doesn't always work especially when he's on the call too.
  14. If you run out of alibis, blame the server. If you work on the mainframes, just run as fast as you can from your seat.
Happy Administering.

Thursday, November 1, 2007

Of Confounded Birthdays et al

I have that darned confounded look when...

  1. ....I wake up this morning to find the whole house sleeping with no one to wish me. So I get back to bed and sleep a wee bit longer...
  2. ....when I still get calls when I'd thought that I'd been wished my everyone I knew last night..
  3. .....I realize that I don't have a new birthday outfit to sport so I choose the most decent looking one from my wardrobe...
  4. ....I rush to the temple just to realize that the therai (doors of the Lord's Chamber) have been shut and that I have to wait another hour to get the Lord's Darshan..
  5. .....I don't know how to react when I visit my friend who's just then lost her father...
  6. .....I meet all my college folks there who have the same confounded look when they whisper a silent Happy Birthday to me at the mourning place...
  7. .....I get a call saying that I have some roses and a cake delivered to me.... (oooooh!)
  8. .....I plot how to flaunt the flowers and cake at work..
  9. .....I cut the cake at my office's canteen knowing that no one's really interest in singing a tune for me when there's a big fat mouth-watering Black-forest cake awaiting us...
  10. .....I watch all the cream being smeared across my face while secretly I wish I could have licked all the cream off my face.. (I'll send you the pics when I get them Harish) :)
  11. ......I receive Takloo 's 'Happppppppppui Budday' call with the same josh-even though its the fourth time..
  12. .......I answer Ramangouda's call by wishing him a Happy Birthday over the phone (this time he had the confounded look)
  13. .....I call Harish and thank him for the beautiful flowers and delicious cake- and narrate how interesting my day has been..
  14. .....I wonder how to describe this day in just one word...
Would 'confounding' to the trick?

Happy Boithday To Me