My Best Friend's Wedding

(Something I wrote a few months back…old stuff can’t hurt)

My best friend got married yesterday. Kal meri yaar ki shadi thi.

This was a special wedding for me for TWO reasons predominantly.
First of all, this would allow me to witness the most important ceremony in my precious friend's life, whom I've known ever since I began to crawl. Those were the days when she'd bite me and I'd cry.(Or was it the other way round, I don't remember).

Secondly, this was my first ever North-Indian wedding.

'The Raos and The Rathis welcome you' , read the big hoarding at the entrance. A confederation of two communities. Thats just euphemism for 'A Love Marriage'.
(I need not mention who one of these names reminds me of )


Much against all speculation, my mom gave me her usual mommy-ka-funda's on how girls nowadays, have the audocity to stand up to their parents and demand what they want(or what they think they want).
Culture this....tradition that...preceeded by the usual 'When I was a girl...' story.
I think my mom covered everything, a normal history book would cover, within those 35 minutes we travelled to the Mandap.
Moms, I tell you, have the innate ability to talk forever, regardless of you paying heed or not. (But I Still love you ma!)


We reached the mandap an hour earlier because the bride was afterall 'our' girl, and we wanted to help around the place, if not just perform the trite(usual) come-smile-eat-smile-leave routine. I found a lot of my friend's parents there, whom I hadn't seen in some gazillion years. All of the mommies gleaming in pride because all of their daughters were married off in great splendour.
What is their hurry I secretly exclaim, but who listens to me!


While I was in my own dream world, (Sahil would know what I mean ), gaping at the grandeur and the melange of colours with which the mandap had been decorated, there suddenly was an army of women cascading themselves to ME shooting out all sorts of questions,which drove me crazy,like ...
'Ah Maythini, when're you going to get married' and ' Maythini darling, your's should be the next wedding'...blah, blah blah blah blah!


I gave them one of those 'Will-your-highnesses-please-mind-their-own-businesses' look, topped with a vibrant smile just to cover my distinct exasperation, while my mom gave me a desperate look, signalling me to be polite with these aunties.
What is it with women and weddings, I ask while I shake my head in defeat.


Suddenly there's this loud drumming noise which startled the entire crowd. Really loud. And everybody goes rushing to the entryway. I go there a few minutes later to see what the crowd's flocked over there for, and I see the groom arriving on a horse. A horse!!

God..it was soooooo adorable. Really!!! Reminded me of the scene from Kuch kuch hota hai, when Salman does an entry on a donkey. :)


My excitement (considering that this was my first non-southie wedding) was clearly visible in that crowd while I was watching the 'scene' intently. Some of the ghar-ka women even let me take the front row seat in watching the celebration. Watching all the girls and women dance there, brought out an insatiable urge in me to go out there and join them in that circle, but my shy-demeanour got the better of me. (As if I'd go there and dance anyway).:)


The second phase of drumming, a few minutes later, was for the bride. She arrived in the traditional Marwadi red attire surrounded by people holding up a carpet of garlands.
God.. She looked stunningly beautiful. I'd never seen my friend is such a graceful and bewitching form before.

Man, girls grow fast!


Finally after doing a mini-chit-chat session at the mandap with the bride and the groom, I descended the alter to watch the bride walk around the whatever-you-call-it 7 times with my jiju.


This ceremony, was then succeeded by the traditional southie-styled ceremony to honour the girl's side. The contrast in these two nuptual(wedding) ceremonies was ever so striking that it set me thinking on another plane; On how varied and beautiful our country's cultures areand perhaps how EVERY girl (and fine, every boy) could have both kinds of ceremonies in their wedding. Gives the wedding a wholesome feel. As ridiculous as it may sound, it certainly looked like a whole lot of fun there. (I'll write on this, sometime during this lifetime)


My friend was getting married to the bloke she loved...something I wouldn't dare do even if you held a gun down my throat....Cheers Aruna!

So..what is my point to all this blah-blah afterall???


'Love' is a feeling, that doesn't smack you at your face when you want it to. Different people find love at different phases of their lives.
But when you think your even 'close' to falling in love, no matter how long you'veknown him/her, no matter how he/she would react... Express it explicitly...Just go for it.

Go for it like, you'd go for a chocolate brownie behind a glass panel...just plunge and indulge without second thoughts.
Trust me, you'd rather vent the feeling out of your *system* and face defeat , than live your entire life wondering what would have happened if you'd just tried.

I dedicate this mail and my arduous hours of pondering over what to write, to..

Deepak Nagar whose just got married....
Aruna (Rao) Rathi, who's unknowingly, the sole inspiration behind this mail...
Those of you in love
Those of you being loved...

Celebrate Love... the most genuine and un-pretentious fashion.

Happy Valentines Day!!

14.2.’07